Sunday May 13, 2012

I find that I now live in a world where emotions change from hour to hour, which makes me nervous about writing this update. The joy of small miracle I just watched has me in amazement. I say little, not to diminish the power of God, but to let you know while still having a sick heart today was an unexpected day. Jess was home with Madison while she was napping and I had come up to the hospital. I had no idea but they came in to do an echo of her heart. Neither of us have been in the room while any procedures have been done so this was uncharted territory for me. After the echo, the Cardiologist Dr. Maher seemed hopeful that there was some improvement worthy of testing. They decided to clamp her off from the ECMO letting her own heart do all the work for a while.

He said clamp her off for 30 minutes and check her gases at 15 minutes and 30 minutes. Her gases are levels of CO2, O2 and her pH level. The first HOUR, which turned out to only be 15 minutes came and went. Gases ok. Not bad but ok. The next 15 minutes actually turned into about 25. Her next gases came back Amazing (even better then on ECMO)

Dr. Maher came back in and was pleased with the numbers and that her heart rate, blood pressure, etc stayed constant and at good levels. Not being used to getting news like this and especially something that seemed that good to me I asked a blunt question. "Dr. Maher you seem to have good bedside manner and Dr. Caudrado, well we all know where I am going here …what are we honestly looking at here? To be more specific on a 1 to 10 what's going on"

He said that the improvement shows that her heart is limping along but could possibly limp along on its own. He wants to try to clamp her off again tomorrow morning and if we get the same results ween her off ECMO all together tomorrow. They have a couple of kids in here in the same situation. The don't need to be on ECMO or a Berlin Heart. So, if this happens tomorrow then it means she has the time on her own for her heart to heal while we wait for a transplant. Not being on the Berlin would be amazing since there is no going back from the Berlin. This gives us yet another chance for God and time to heal her before any other measures are taken. He said we are not out of the woods by far. If 0 was no heart activity and an 8,9,10 was normal we were a 3. But again a 3 can get you by if not get better.

I can only imagine that this was a great MOTHER'S DAY for Jess. And speaking of Jess, I want you all to know as well as her that she is the most amazing mother. She has a strength that surpasses most and a loving compassion for her girls and family that is beyond anything I could ever imagine. She is an amazing mother to all 3 of us. We love her and thank God for her. We will take the rest of this day to be thankful to God for the news and mother he has given us.